Miss Three is at war with her carers, and I’m on her side..

Here’s a confession, I haven’t had major sleep problems with Miss Three since she was four months old.

That’s not to say we’re not up a lot during the nights; there are often bad dreams, illness, heat or cold issues and sometimes a need for emergency cuddles, but we know that in the grand scheme of things, we’re pretty fortunate.

I’m the last person to claim the credit.  We had fantastic support from the sleep support centre provided by our local area health service when Miss Three was four months old.  As hapless parents who knew very little, this was a godsend.

Since then things have gone fairly well.  Miss Three gave up her daytime sleep about six months ago, it made the evening bedtime quicker and less stressful and we’re quite relaxed about that.

But every day she’s at daycare, her carers spend two hours trying to get her to sleep.  They pat, cajole and beg and she just doesn’t sleep. I get reports (from her) about how they will try and get her to ‘be good and have a sleep today’.

And I really don’t care.

I understand that those who work in daycare need a break during the day – this is absolutely not about that.  I also understand that some kids need a sleep, and others a little quiet time, but I do not understand telling a child that good behaviour is sleeping when they really have no physical need for one?

We spend the first few years of our children’s loves agonizing over their sleep patterns.  There’s a very good reason that Go the F*** to Sleep is a bestseller.  And it’s a serious issue for working mums, who are trying to commute, make decisions and function like regular human beings during the day, often on very little sleep.

I’d love to get an afternoon kip on the weekends, and it was lovely while it lasted, but if they don’t need it, there’s simply  not much you can do about it.

I try so hard to support our lovely carers and any rules or processes they implement.  I think consistency in expectations, especially on things like manners, eating patterns and treatment of other people, is really important.

But I’m sorry daycare, I just can’t back you up on this one.


7 responses to “Miss Three is at war with her carers, and I’m on her side..

  1. I remember the days when the child care workers would complain that my son Alex would tell the carers he was Batman, use his sleep time blanket as a cape, and leap frog all the other sleeping children… they just didn’t see the funny side! He was not a sleeper at all and it was a fruitless battle to get him to try. I’m with you on this one!

  2. Marilyn and Lyndon Andrews

    It’s all so ridiculous. She’s 3 and a 1/2 after all. When do they stop doing this? Will they try to keep up this routine for the rest of the year, and then in one year she has to get used to a more formalised learning situation, (preschool and then school – if she starts in 2014) as well as dropping what they consider essential at the moment – a 2 hour sleep? Are they even thinking or just taking one day ar a time and “doing what they’ve always done” I’m with you! (What a surprise!) Love Mum

  3. I just found out from Rachel (who is 9!) that they tried to get the kids to have a sleep at holiday care today!! Crazy. Sounds like its more for the workers than the children.

  4. I’ve asked since my son was 3 that they don’t let him sleep too long. Usually they ignore me so then he’s up until 9 with me and getting the dishes done and clothes washed becomes a much greater challenge. Next year he’s at school so should have that sorted.

  5. This story is a surprise to me. I asked my childcare to make sure my 3yo only has a maximum of one hour sleep during the day, as otherwise he goes to sleep too late and it’s difficult to wake him up in time the next morning for childcare. They were very understanding and accommodating! They just give him a quiet activity to do so as not to wake up the kids that are sleeping. It seems I am lucky with my childcare if they are not all as agreeable as mine!

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